Are you there God? It's me again...that crazy lady who keeps bugging you!

So, as many of our friends and family know, Derick will soon be medically separated from the good ol' Marine Corps.   It's taken a lot of tears and cups of coffee for me to process my life without someone in digiflage calling most of the shots.  Call me crazy, insane, or a masochist but I like this life.  It may be hard and not always ideal, but it's been "the normal" for me since I packed up my things at newly 20 years old and headed off to California to be with my new Marine husband.

So, here we are - 6 years, 2 deployments, and 3 kids later and we're facing the dreaded word that most military families cringe at ... CIVILIAN life!  Eeeeeek!  Needless to say, I've been doing a lot of praying the last few months.  Which leads me to the point of my rambling.  About 2 weeks ago I decided I needed to pray... and when I say pray, I didn't mean the couple word prayers that I sometimes sputter out when I'm aggravated or upset ( "Lord, help me not kill my children")... No, I mean the long, heart to heart, soul cleansing, comforting, conversation with God.  So I went to the only place where I ever have a smidgen of privacy - the bathroom!  I figured God wouldn't mind.  And I spent about 40 minutes just talking and praying with him.  I gave up the burden of worry and anxiety that had been weighing on me about this whole job process for Derick.  I prayed God would open the right doors and lead our family to the right job for him.  I prayed for God to change me, allow me to be the wife Derick needed me to be, the mother my kids needed me to be, and most of all, I prayed for peace and comfort as we enter this new chapter of our lives that is very much unknown right now. I gave the entire situation to Him and asked for God to control it.  Whatever His will was, then that's what I wanted.  I left that bathroom feeling a heck of a lot better than when I went into it.
The next day, Derick came home and told me he had an interview with a certain job he had been interested in.  Then a few days later, another job opened up to him.  A few days after that, a road block we had encountered regarding the military and a certain civilian job was removed.  Little by little, I could see things changing.  It's like I'm watching and witnessing God carving out the path for our family.
I saw a quote in one of my Bible devotionals.  It read " "Prayer does not change the purpose of God.  But prayer does change the action of God."

My 40 minutes in the bathroom may have been just a minuscule amount of time but I believed it changed alot.  I'm now not so anxious or worried by our future but I have peace that no matter what, we'll be taken care of.  And you can bet I'll be spending a lot more time on my knee's ... in the bathroom.  :)